Tracy and I had a major crisis and tragedy to deal with in 2014.
That situation made me realize that I had never fully submitted to God in thirty plus years of calling myself a Christian.
It forced me to get on my knees before my Creator, and acknowledge Him as Sovereign, and I gave Him control of every single thing…
If you’d like to learn more about this, I included the details in this article:
My Testimony
What followed has been wonderful, but also has resulted in a series of difficult realizations.
Let’s take a look at some of this…
#1 When I submitted to the Father, I began to gain new understanding of the scriptures.
I didn’t know it at the time, but I was experiencing what is described in 2Corinthians 3:14-16
But their minds were hardened, for to this day, when the Old Testament is being read, that same veil remains, not lifted, because in Messiah it is taken away.
But to this day, when Mosheh is being read, a veil lies on their heart.
And when one turns to the Master, the veil is taken away.
I had turned my heart to Yehova, and as a result, my veil was lifted.
The writings of Moses had been withheld from my understanding up to that point, just as this bit of scripture describes.
But when I submitted my life to Messiah [for real, for the first time, even though I had claimed to do so previously], my veil was removed and I began to understand things very differently.
I began to realize that the Torah is forever, and is still applicable today.
This was an exciting journey of discovery and learning. It was fascinating. And I loved it.
But a second realization began to plow through my mind:
#2 If the Torah is true and applicable, then what about the mainstream churches who reject the Torah, stating that the Law is done away with?
I began to study just who is our Messiah? There is a wealth of information in the scriptures. I began to piece together who He is based on scriptures. I began to realize that “Jesus of the Mainstream Church” is not the same as our Messiah. [Everybody grab yer torches and pitchforks!!!]
I know this is an extremely difficult idea to wrap our heads around, but wrap we must…
As much of a surprise as this was to me, it would not have been surprising had I simply known the scriptures.
Jeremiah tells us this would happen:
Jeremiah 16:19-20
O Yehova, my strength and my fortress,
My refuge in the day of affliction,
The Gentiles shall come to You
From the ends of the earth and say,
“Surely our fathers have inherited lies,
Worthlessness and unprofitable things.”
20 Will a man make gods for himself,
Which are not gods?
Jeremiah tells us that we will have learned nothing but lies.
And the results of those lies?
Men will make up gods for themselves (as in a Jesus that does not match Yeshua Messiah in the scriptures).
While this idea is understandably offensive and hurtful for those who have dedicated their lives to “Jesus” [as I did for thirty years], if Jeremiah predicted this problem, we owe it to ourselves to study it in scripture and find out where we stand.
I wrote this article long ago in December 2016, comparing Jesus to Yeshua Messiah. Keep in mind, I had not yet studied the scriptures in great depth, but this article begins the exploration and study of this idea:
Which Jesus Do You Love?
#3 Then the third realization hit me… If Jesus is not the same as Messiah, what will happen to the people who seek him out?
Jeremiah told us indirectly.
He said the lies are worthless and unprofitable.
Salvation is profitable, so this is quite bad.
Verse 20 above says men will make up gods who are not gods.
If they are not gods, then they cannot save us.
But the true Messiah in scripture is YHWH (God), and He can save us!!
Yes, these ideas are difficult. But let’s keep going.
Realization #4 Two years ago, I became angry that I had been lied to. I became angry that many millions, if not billions, of people have been lied to.
I was pretty upset with our church organizations and leaders. I realized that churches voluntarily enter into 501C3 contracts with the US Government (at least here in the States), even though the 501C3 forms specifically say churches are not required to do so. Churches are already considered tax exempt organizations by definition in the IRS code. And yet, churches sign agreements (contracts) with the government anyway, even though the instructions say not to. Scripture says we cannot serve two masters. We can either be in covenant with Yehova, or we can be under contract to the IRS and US Government. We can’t do both.
Having served on a church board, I learned that nearly all of the money brought into a church goes to self-preservation. They spend nearly all of their budget on salaries, rent or mortgages, maintenance and upkeep of commercial property, etc.
Very little church money goes to support the food pantry or to help the congregation or community. Do churches help with these things? Not exactly. This responsibility is typically placed on the congregation, by donating money and time above and beyond the contributions to the church. The congregants do these acts of benevolence, but the church gets (and takes) credit for it.
But then Realization #5 hit me.
Church leaders do not know what they do not know.
I learned from scripture that the truth is promised to those who truly seek it.
We are promised that if we truly seek Yehova, we will find Him.
We are promised for wisdom and understanding from Yehova in James 1:5-8
5 But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God,[b] who gives to all without hesitation and without reproach; and it will be given to him. 6 But let him ask in faith, without any doubting—for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. 7 For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord— 8 he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.
But many do not know the truth, even though they spend a great deal of time seeking and pursuing churchy things.
But then, I found this direct quote of Messiah:
Matthew 13:10-16
10And the taught ones came and said to Him, “Why do You speak to them in parables?” 11And He answering, said to them, “Because it has been given to you to know the secrets of the reign of the heavens, but to them it has not been given. 12“For whoever possesses, to him more shall be given, and he shall have overflowingly; but whoever does not possess, even what he possesses shall be taken away from him. 13“Because of this I speak to them in parables, because seeing they do not see, and hearing they do not hear, nor do they understand. 14“And in them the prophecy of Yeshayahu is completely filled, which says, ‘Hearing you shall hear and by no means understand, and seeing you shall see and by no means perceive, 15for the heart of this people has become thickened, and their ears are hard of hearing, and their eyes they have closed, lest they should see with their eyes and hear with their ears, lest they should understand with their heart, and turn back, and I heal them.’ 16“And blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear…”
Yeshua Messiah says that the secrets of the kingdom of heaven are intentionally withheld from those with thickened or calloused hearts. [Those who have not turned their hearts fully to the Master, as 2Corinthians 3 describes, quoted above at the beginning.]
They don’t know what they don’t know.
They believe what they believe, and don’t know any different.
They are not teaching lies on purpose.
They teach lies because they don’t know the truth.
And this explains why no mainstream church leaders could answer any of my questions early in my Torah walk.
Realization #6
While handwriting the bible, word for word, I learned the Exodus story in great detail. When I handwrite the bible, nothing escapes my attention. I see and read and write every minute detail.
I noticed something really great about Moses.
Every time the people rebelled against Yehova, and Yehova wanted to destroy them for it, Moses fell on his face and prayed.
He interceded for the people and prayed to Yehova that He would not destroy them. And Yehova honored his prayers.
We are told these details throughout the Exodus story as it occurs.
But I noticed in Deuteronomy, these events are “reviewed” with additional details given.
Moses prayed for forty days and forty nights for the people.
Let that sink in for a moment…
When you agree to pray for someone, how much effort do you put into it? Do you pray once and forget about it? Do you pray several times as the circumstance comes to mind?
I know for a fact that I have never prayed for anyone for forty days and forty nights while fasting the whole time!!
Deuteronomy 9:18-19
18 “Then I fell down before Yehova like the first time, for 40 days and 40 nights. I did not eat bread or drink water—because of all your sin that you committed, doing evil in Yehova’s sight, provoking Him to anger. 19 For I was afraid of the fierce wrath and fury which Yehova bore toward you—to destroy you. But Yehova listened to me that time also.
It took time to study and to learn all of these [and many more] details in scripture. And, by the way, I am barely scratching the surface regarding these things in this writing. I have 200 plus articles in this blog if you’d like the details…
Realization #7
It is not my place to be angry with false teachers.
It is not my place to be upset with men and women who teach falsely.
Why?
It is because they do not know they teach falsely.
It is their fault, because according to scripture, they have not turned their hearts to Yehova.
But it is between them and Yeshua Messiah.
It is not my responsibility to put this weight on my shoulders.
It is not my place to deal with this problem.
Here is what Messiah says about them:
Matthew 15:14
14 “Leave them alone; they are blind guides of the blind. And if a blind man leads a blind man, both will fall into a pit.”
Instead, I study scripture and write about it. I speak about it to anyone who wants to listen.
I share what I learn with others, as much as I possibly can.
I pray frequently that Yehova would help me, that He would guide my words. I pray frequently that I do not misrepresent His truth.
No, that isn’t it. I actually pray that He would prevent me from misrepresenting His truth.
If you’ve been through some of this, as I have, and are angry with the church — forgive them. They do not know what they do.
Pray for them, just as Moses prayed for the people of Israel.
Is this difficult for you?
Then follow the example set by Yeshua Messiah:
Luke 23:34
34 But Yeshua was saying, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”
And now I am working through Realization #8:
Many who call themselves Torah Observant are not really.
Many follow partially, only doing the things they are comfortable doing.
Many follow only when it is convenient for them.
Many believe they follow Yehova, but turn away from Him when tested.
I see many arguments and disputes on Torah sites.
If you see someone who is following partially, pray for them.
Do not argue with them, because it is not profitable.
Yehova tells us numerous times to do ALL that He has commanded.
Not some.
Not just the parts we like.
Not just the parts we find easy enough.
ALL that He commanded.
Encourange your friends to do so as well, especially if they are not.
But don’t argue with them.